Stuff

How much “stuff” do you have? And is it the right kind of stuff? Does your stuff make you happy? Or do you have stuff that’s bringing you down? After Haiti, I’ve realized that the most important assets that we have aren’t necessarily what we tend to accumulate as Americans. And as we are packing the house to put things in storage for a bit, I am forced to look at what needs to be readily available, what can be deferred for the future, and what is no longer serving a significant purpose and should be given to others or discarded.

I am sure that you can all relate to how daily, it’s easier just to order a replacement for something that we can’t find, than take the effort to keep organized or look for it. We pick up that extra jar of specialty olives, just in case it’s needed for the recipe we saw six months ago. We buy the latest video game, DVD, or sports equipment, convincing ourselves that this time, we’ll use it regularly and enjoy it. But after the newness wears off and we get bored, it sits unused until it is time to move. In many ways, these are the easiest things to deal with. It’s a “sunk cost,” and you convince yourself that you really will use it the next time, or, if you are pragmatic, you discard it.

It’s much harder when your stuff is associated with other lives, experiences, and connections to the past. Our oldest two boys have completed college and are finding their way in California. Our daughter just turned 20 and is leaving for 7 months in Paris. I am looking at pictures and projects from their school years. I know I should save some, even if they haven’t looked at them for years. Then I stumble across photos of my parents, my high school yearbook, and letters to friends and family. Looking at a young couple, he’s in uniform – how could they imagine what lies ahead. What would they bring from their own families and then pass on to their children and grandchildren? All of us try to provide for those we love, sometimes it’s material things, hopefully, it is the stuff of support and understanding.

In America, we are encouraged to be consumers- our economy is driven on production and consumption. When the kids were home, there were six computers logged onto the network. For all of us, it was almost cheaper to buy a new computer than pay for the latest Windows and Office upgrade. Then jobs disappeared and credit dried up. The latest downturn has made all of us refocus on what it is we really need, on the intangibles that make us whole, and what truly brings us energy and enlightenment. It is not about accumulating stuff.

The local Salvation Army Donation Center is about a mile from my home on the border between an upscale neighborhood and downtown. I’ve become a regular over the last couple of months. Stacks of clothing, furniture, children’s games, household supplies – they were all cataloged, (for my tax deductible donation), placed in the back of the SUV and driven down. The men working there had faces that told stories of struggle and hope. I carried the bags to the loading dock, then turned and drove off. But as I looked back, I saw the center was connected to the meeting hall, the thrift store and the adult rehab center. Several residents were outside, cleaning up around a lone tree on the edge of the sidewalk. Families and students from local colleges were emerging from the store, with clothes, a couch for the apartment, or maybe a puzzle for a birthday gift. I expect that what they paid was small, but that money helped feed the men next door and gave them a place of respite. The stuff that I no longer needed, or perhaps had never used, was giving to others.


I returned to the now empty house, the floors were swept clean and movers had left. As I walked through each room, my footsteps echoed against the bare walls, there was no stuff to muffle the sound. It is no fun to move, and future directions are uncertain, but it many ways I felt lighter. I had taken the opportunity to cull through and feel the accumulations of the past, define the things I need now, and position myself for the future.

And the cool thing about these movers – everything was cataloged, so when it’s time for a new place, they can deliver enough to make it comfortable and homey. The rest can stay in storage, if necessary. After all, I’m sure our three kids will need some good stuff (and the memories that come with it,) as they start to build their own lives.